Prices

This is the entire Monster Cleaning Wood Green list, and the number beside each job is the number you pay, wherever you live on the round. A room of carpet is the same money in a flat above the parade as it is in a five bedroom house near the park gates. Where a job looks out of the ordinary, you are told during the booking call and not afterwards.

End of tenancy, by bedroom count

The band follows the room count on your own tenancy and is agreed before a date goes in the diary. No clock runs against it. A generous two bedroom pays exactly what a cramped one pays, and an overrun is ours to swallow. A let loft room adds to the total; bathrooms never do, whatever the number. In a converted house we count the flat and not the building, which is the ordinary case around Noel Park and along the Harringay Ladder. The oven is never inside the band: it goes on as its own line at £31, so a two bedroom handover with the oven is £274, while floors are always separate too, at a lower rate than a floors-only visit, and the end of tenancy page explains why. Anything a clerk queries inside 48 hours is redone free.

Floors and rugs

Allow two hours before anyone walks on it and most of a day before the pile has dried right down. Two receptions opened into one bill once, as a through lounge at £61. A carpeted hall is £22 and a carpeted landing £9, each billed on its own, since both are small tool work rather than long passes. A staircase with a half landing partway up remains one flight, with that landing billed at £9 like any other; a house split into an upper and a lower flat brings a second £41. Rugs are done on the floor they already lie on. The carpet page sets out drying times and the marks that lift best.

Add the floors up before you ring

A few minutes with the room list gives you the whole figure. Take a Noel Park terrace let as one house and count it exactly as it lies: hall £22, living room £43, one flight £41, landing £9 and two bedrooms £72, so £187. Hardly anybody does all of that in one visit. The usual booking is a hall with a flight, £63 on the list and so charged at the £67 minimum, generally in winter once the paths over Ducketts Common have gone to mud. On the narrow stairs east of the High Road that flight is worked one tread at a time by hand, which is precisely why it is priced separately instead of being buried in a room rate.

Appliances

One appliance, one number. An oven with its own grill box overhead still bills as one single. A double is charged once, not twice. Whatever lifts out is soaked; whatever is bolted down is worked by hand at the worktop. The cavity is dried off before we leave, so the cooker takes a meal that evening. The £143 AGA has to be stone cold on arrival, which means the night before rather than at breakfast. Catalytic and pyrolytic liners are never soaked, and the oven page explains how each coated panel is looked after.

Hourly housework rates

Regular visits run from three hours. Ironing at £12 an hour is added to that time, so the kitchen and bathroom keep their full share. Visit length round here is set by the number of staircases and the state of the bathroom rather than by the bedroom count, and the water accounts for the second of those. How far each length of visit gets is on the regular cleaning page.

Team deep cleans

Three inputs generate that whole table: £26 for each hour each cleaner spends on site, £30 for machines and detergents, and a floor of two people over three hours. Bottom £186, top £498. Leave your own machine and products out and the £30 is dropped. Finish ahead of the booked time and you pay for hours worked. Worth noticing that two cleaners across six hours and three across four both come to £342, so pick that one on the shape of your day rather than the money. Where those hours actually go is set out on the deep clean page, and round here a fair slice of them goes on scale and on staircases.

Sofas, chairs, mattresses and curtains

Billed per item rather than per room, and never against a clock. Curtains stay on the pole while they are cleaned, and the long drops mostly come from the taller windows on the Alexandra Park slope. Nothing above a two seater carries a printed price, because fabric, arm shape and whether the back cushions come off decide between an hour and an afternoon, so describe yours on the phone and the figure follows. Leather is hand work throughout, cleaner and then conditioner, with no machine involved.

The £67 minimum

It attaches to one off bookings, and most jobs pass it without anyone giving it a thought. The exceptions are small and specific: a lone carpeted bedroom at £36, an armchair at £33, a rug or a mattress at £35, a hob at £23, an extractor at £28. Hourly work is exempt, which is why three weekly hours, the shortest regular visit, genuinely is £69 and nothing further. Stack two small jobs into one morning and the minimum applies once across the pair, which puts that bedroom carpet back at £36.

What every figure already includes

Descaling, which on this supply is most of what a bathroom really needs. An air mover left blowing on a staircase that is drying slowly. Any evening hour and any day of the week, because one rate covers 8am to 7pm throughout, from Bounds Green in N11 down to the Ladder in N4. And, on a move-out, a return visit inside 48 hours where a clerk marks down something we cleaned.

Parking, and properties that need a longer day

Parking is charged only where a road needs it, at actual cost, as our terms set out. A property that needs more than a handover is costed by the team hour instead, and we agree that on the phone before any slot is taken.

Where the list holds

Everywhere the van goes: Turnpike Lane, Bounds Green, Alexandra Park, Hornsey, Tottenham and Harringay, taking in N22, N8, N11, N17 and N4. Crossing a postcode boundary alters nothing on the invoice. What each area tends to book is on the areas page, hours are on the contact page, and 020 8077 9085 reaches the office.

Questions we get asked

How do I pay?

Cash, bank transfer or card, and Visa, Mastercard and Amex are all accepted. The weekly round mostly pays monthly by transfer while landlords and agents get an invoice.

Could the figure change once you see the property?

Only where what we find is materially unlike what you described, and you would be told before anything came out of the van. Ordinary wear never shifts a band. The two lines sitting outside it are the floors and the oven, on every job.

How is a flat inside a converted house priced?

On the rooms your own tenancy covers, not on the building. A two bedroom upper flat is £243 even where the deeds record a three bedroom house. Where two kitchens or two bathrooms are in daily use, we scope the rooms in use and price from that.

What is the smallest job you take?

Anything at all, though one off work meets a £67 minimum, so a lone bedroom carpet at £36 or a single hob at £23 bills at £67. Two small jobs in one morning satisfy it once between them. Hourly housework is free of it, though a regular visit is never shorter than three hours.